The ADHD Fix

Wimp Parents Need to Stop Using Time-Out

2016-12-12 08:45:44

By Dr. Henry J. Svec

 

If you are using time-out as a form of discipline, you likely aren’t doing it correctly, as reported this past week by the CBC: http://www.cbc.ca/news/health/time-outs-study-parenting-1.3888166.  According to the research conducted in the United States, parents are incorrectly using this popular technique of punishment because of the following:

 

  1. Giving too many warnings before actually using time-out.
  2. Talking too much to the child during the time-out period.
  3. Giving the child the power to decide when the time-out should be over.

 

For many children, if the time-out is used ineffectively, as this research suggests, 85% of the time Wimp Parents are actually increasing the chance that the bad behaviour will increase BECAUSE they used time-out in the first place.

 

Talking to your child while they are in time-out reinforces that negative behaviour.  There is nothing punishing about sitting in a chair and talking to your parents.

 

Giving the child the opportunity to decide when time-out is over is another sign of Wimp Parenting.  You are handing over the power to your child - who is ill equipped to handle this freedom.  It’s your job to parent, so stop handing that responsibility off to your 4-year-old.

 

As I discuss in “Don’t Be a Wimp Raise a Strong Leader,” https://www.amazon.ca/Dont-Wimp-Raise-Strong-Leader-ebook/dp/B01JP00ROY/ref=tmm_kin_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1470509909&sr=8-7, parenting is a job that demands that you do what is in the best interest of your child regardless of how it makes YOU feel.

 

It would be best if you cannot Parent with Courage, that you stop using time-out.  It likely will be impossible for you to use any form of discipline because you first need to understand how to do that.  You can pick up my book on Kindle.ca this month for $4.04 to start the learning process.  If you need an intensive parent training approach, go to my website www.drsvec.com and click on the Preview the Parent With Courage Online Class button, and when you purchase it, type in the discount code “blogreader” and get 50% off during the month of December.  It’s a discount only available to my blog readers and their families.  If you know of someone who is having difficulty with managing the time-out process, email this blog to them.  The other choice is to stop using discipline of any sort and hope and pray that random chance or genetics will be enough to overcome your being a Wimp when it comes to parenting your child.  I’m hoping you choose to Parent with Courage. Take action today.

 

As always your comments are appreciated directly to me at drsvec@drsvec.com.